Random Thoughts

A

ANOTHER EPIC FAIL- TALE 1

​

 For the past two years I have been riding a rollercoaster and one, that I admit, I put myself on. One would have thought that after having my fiancé cheat on me and break my heart into a million pieces, any dating or second chance at love would have been removed from my bucket list.

But nope. And as luck would have it, this was, yet again, a very bad choice.

I have a long history of not choosing the right person for whatever reason. I don't know if it relates to my upbringing and not always feeling like I was good enough, or never getting enough attention, but my general history of men choices has been less than stellar.

The comical thing was that when I found this person, I was really doing quite well after being in a state of never-ending depression for what seemed like eternity. I approached getting back into dating as somewhat of a distraction, or something to entertain me and fill in the boring spots in my week. It is also important to note that I, even in my broken relationship with my fiancé, remained and remain fiercely independent. I enjoy my alone times, can support myself financially, and don't need a bloodhound as a partner.

Enter Exhibit A. A is for Asshole. Yes, it is.

Let's call him Richard. Better yet, let's refer to him as Dick. It takes up less space.

Dick was a good-looking guy. On his Match profile, he was wearing Quicksilver board shorts, shirtless, standing on a boat holding a dolphin he had caught. He had on a visor, Costa sunglasses and had a 3-day shadow of facial hair. HOT.

His profile indicated he was a romantic, loved beach sunrises and sunsets, loved all types of music, and had a great sense of humor. All things that resonated with me. He lived close enough but also far away enough. We started with texting, graduated to talking on the phone and eventually set a date to meet somewhere. Up to this point, things seemed to being going at a doable pace for me, and he seemed intelligent enough. He did appear to text me just a touch more than I was texting him, but it did not get me bothered.

We decide to meet at a restaurant/bar that has a band playing. I am of course running a few minutes behind, and I have already received 3 texts from him that I have unanswered, asking where I am. Are you standing me up? What's your ETA?

Hmmmm. This seems a bit needy to me, but I am in this now.

I enter the bar area and recognize him immediately. He is standing in front of a barstool that he has leaned over the bar in order to save it for me. He is also engaged in conversation with a girl. He does not see me coming so I alert him by walking up behind him. "Gee, I don't mean to interrupt here!" He spins around and practically jumps out of his docksiders, picks me up and hugs me.

Hmmm. Thats a bit much for me. But OK.

I order a cocktail, and he pulls the barstool out so I can sit. He stands next to me as there are no more available places to sit. We engage in nice conversation, doing the normal Q&A routine, and he seems nice enough. He is a bit handsy and does though tend to talk a lot about himself and his many accomplishments, his money, boats, big houses he had in California and his expensive lifted 250F trucks.

He seemed a tad bit insecure, but maybe it's about his attempt to impress me. I alert him to the fact that I do not place interest in material items and leave out the fact that I don't have a boat, a big house, nor do I drive a 250F truck. I don't care. I tell him I have a lot of friends and family that I like to spend my time with, that I enjoy my independence and that what I am looking for right now is casual dating. I felt a need to set the stage, even if it may have been premature. He was like a horse running wild that I had to pull the reigns back to gain control.

He seemed a bit defeated from my comment, but I was not ready for another full-time relationship. I was just starting to love myself again! The night ended with him walking me out to my car. (A Volvo T6, btw) grabbing at my hand to hold it and asking me if I wanted to get together again on Sunday. This was Friday. I answered that I usually have brunch with my kids on Sunday, so I would have to get back to him.

Dick didn't like that answer. He dropped my hand and gave me a look I don't like to relive. I apologized, (for what??) and said, "let's plan on talking tomorrow to see if Sunday might be possible for me." He replied quite tersely that he would break any plans he had to see me if I asked. HUH?

OK. Houston, we have a problem now.

I explained to Dick calmly that I do not break plans that I have committed to, and I would not expect him to do that for me. He loosened up a bit and apologized. "I just can't wait to go out again, that's all, Carrie."

In my head it sounded something like " Well you selfish prick, you will need to wait if you want to go out again. This is not about you. See you later or not".

I miraculously said "Dick, that's very sweet. I am sure we can find time to get together again. I had a lovely time."

How I managed that reply remains a mystery, but I just wanted to get the fuck out of there and be home already. He gave me a kiss on the cheek- too close to my lips for my liking and opened my car door for me. I asked him where he parked, and he motioned to the other side of the lot. Not sure why, but I offered to drive him to his car, and he immediately declined, almost as if I found something out. I said "Ok, drive safe."

I turned on my car, opened up my sunroof, and watched him walk away towards the far end of the lot. I put my car in gear and drove the opposite way to the exit. Then I had a thought. What was he so defensive about when I offered the ride? It was strange. I turned on a side road and turned my car off, positioned where I could see when he drove out of the parking lot. I heard what sounded like a jalopy with the muffler blown. I saw Dick drive by. It was his muffler that was making all the noise. It was a shell of a 1980's Toyota truck that looked like it was picked up from a dump.

Well, that's no F250, is it?

​